Jessica

Tue, 29 Mar 2005 04:09:44 GMT

But know there's no backing out.
This is gonna be reality.
You can never dream it down.

I have no way of telling the two apart.

come on just do it
well i want to make you hurt. and i want to make you cry.
remember that?

Thu, 13 Jan 2005 04:26:02 GMT

and i miss us too.when we have time to miss that is.but don't feel bad lovely, no one has time for anything anymore,specially the things that count.
today i wanted to play outside in the rain and clouds.but i guess thats insane?
and i wished that it wasn't so early, or so late, or only half an hour long, and that we could have playedordancedorscreamed .or been okay. for a little bit. sorry for broadcasting

oh by the way...you're so pretty

Like a Lady

Fri, 31 Dec 2004 02:23:50 GMT

Hey guess what everyone!
As of tonight
I'm officaly going to be a girl
Yep, everyday
Woo!

Fri, 12 Nov 2004 03:09:21 GMT

Happy Birthday To You

Fri, 20 Aug 2004 19:49:00 GMT

i seriously think my best friend hates me

Thu, 19 Aug 2004 04:34:50 GMT

so my memory slipped again
but you brought it back...
the cell phone, the music, the driving.
do you remember too? (i'm insane)

i'm running away everyone.
to east lansing
to live with my Zack
so i won't be available for a while

And I guess that I miss you, and I'm sorry
if I dissed you
Goddamn I am such a jerk, I can't do anything

pull on my hair and bite me like that

Mon, 16 Aug 2004 04:22:25 GMT

alright so i miss you
where do we go from here?

ugh, i opened this little screen with so much to say, but now it all seems silly and petty.

it seems strange that summer is almost over with. last summer of highschool.
but hey, like i really care all that much
someone said we're going into the real world.
but if this isn't real...i don't want to figure out what is.

(you're not really sure what you're doin this for but you need something to fill up the days)

so you've been gone all week...its kinda strange.
but i'm looking back...and all the stuff thats happened seems ridiculous...like i just want to keep going, and not go back to explain who said what, and why we went there.

(i hang like a star...fucking glow in the dark for all the starving eyes to see)

so you're just about the greatest friend ever. i feel like one of those girlfriends who posts about their boyfriends, trying to convince the lj world how their boyfriend is the best thing thats happened. but thanks. for just being there. and turning things around...till i end up spitting pop all over my pants and can't even remember why i was in hysterics. blah

(everything is leading to the point where you just don't know what to do)

i changed my hair again. maybe i'll feel motivated to get dolled up (or actually do my hair) and i'll take some pictures for you peoples. or maybe you can just come see it for yourselves...get the real life effect.

oh so there is this community. and its called _true_beauties_

Lets Sail Away

what's the last thing i said to you? can't count on anyone but you...

Tue, 20 Jul 2004 03:25:13 GMT

This town has good hearts
Bad blood, emotional scars
Never get to say what you really wanna say
We all lie so well

well...
i can't believe this, but i really miss you. no, i miss the substance. some people have absolutely nothing to say...words just keep coming
and i'm just like that now too.
i'd like to pretend you are just the same. i'd like to pretend you are everything i never let you be. but i guess...

and whatever happened to best friends? maybe thats the way friends go. i guess when we pretend we'll be best friends forever, we always know we won't. nothing turns out anymore. or in the first place

i never write in my little livejournal. i remember being so excited to get it, and so excited when you picked out a name and everything. somehow i don't see day to day life interesting enough to post the events in my life. but i guess my random rambles to no one are just about as significant.

so heres to my best friend of right now
maybe we will be best friends a long time. i mean...aren't there dumb sayings about not talking and then "finding" again? one more fucking cliche.

our motivation's out to sea.

Wed, 07 Jul 2004 01:13:29 GMT

I miss my Zack
and that is all

Sun, 20 Jun 2004 04:48:18 GMT

what a night

**edit**
thanks asshole
at least someone was paying attention (ha yeah right)
love yas

you only think about yourself

Sun, 13 Jun 2004 02:47:50 GMT

tonight was adams dance recitial
it was very nice
he danced amazingly,
he is a very sexy boy

i went with val and mar, and i miss those girls dearly
i miss all the girls really
i say, this summer, we do another little spend the night get together
before we "go off to college", or just plain forget each other

miss jessica-
i miss you dearly. i'm sorry that we have no more time. i promise that monday is all yours.
i love you sugar dumpling
-cookie

and how long would it take
if we were trapped in an elevator after the earthquake
five stories under debris
you and me in the garden indefinitely

Sat, 29 May 2004 22:22:43 GMT

i'm tired of all the people who are supposed to understand
and don't
maybe i expect to much
but weren't you supposed to be able to tell?
sorry for not being good enough
i was just in a horrible mood
again...

again

and so tonight to celebrate i will poison myself.
another coughing, shaking fit in a bathroom that is spinning.
so i close the door and rest my head on the tile floor,
sickness and sleep turning me cold.
i am still not sure, is there some better place i could be heading towards?

come home...no one needs you in kentucky
i can promise you

and i wonder if you read this...
i almost hope you do
you're so far away...if you were closer...
yeah, i love you kid

Wed, 12 May 2004 02:06:53 GMT

since ellen is being superific, and not coming to physics tomorrow for her birthday....

::happy birthday lush::

Mon, 10 May 2004 01:39:13 GMT

why does rain look like a flood of tears

i have a friend name adam. he goes to tapp (wcspa) with me. hes an awesome kid. we're going to make a movie called mean boys, and he will be the lead. i will be his love interest. on friday, adam signed my hip. it was sexy. i am going to adams dance recital on june 12th. i'm excited to see him dance, because he is very very good at it. i think thats about all i have to say about my friend adam tonight.

Thu, 06 May 2004 01:59:59 GMT

i never want to feel (foryou) again

Wed, 05 May 2004 03:47:25 GMT

on top...all i can think about is how it would be to fall

(what would i think. what would i say. would i scream or be perfectly still. who would i see...who would i remember the very last. would you even matter as much as you do now?)

to think it all in a split second, and then realize....

its to late, and i should be in bed. its to late and i shouldn't be working on my physics car. its to late and my homework should have been done hours ago. to many should's, not enough haves.

today was a waste of a day. tuesday like this should be taken a part. all the good things can go in one box, all the bad in another. the good box can be put into one beautiful day, and during that day we'll throw the bad tuesday into the ocean. for forever

hey carl- sorry about being mia lately. we WILL get together, as soon as i get time for anything whatsoever. know that i don't "hate you".
your loving girlfriend-
jess

...take the money and run...

Mon, 03 May 2004 02:40:10 GMT

::much thanks to amy and marlene::

Thu, 29 Apr 2004 20:06:52 GMT

timmy.is.dead

...rest in peace...

hey you

Fri, 23 Apr 2004 04:20:26 GMT

didyouknowimissyou

Wed, 21 Apr 2004 21:20:48 GMT

It's not that I don't trust you,
I just know what you've been up to
You're down for sellin me out,
while I play dumb
it's cool cause I let you
forget the letters that I kept,
this is another I won't send

Hey you-
i just read your entry. i was going to write something before i even did, but now i think i have more to say. i just wanted you to know...that i respect you for saying something. i already knew they all talk about me, its a given. but at least you had the respect to say something. i'm not writing this for any drama, or anyone to be mad, but simply to thank you. thank you for being mature enough to talk to me about it. i'm sorry about the unsaid words, and the fact that none of us can get along, without hidden motives and thoughts. i guess i kinda know why we don't all hang out anymore...we can't handle being friends without someone getting jealous, or catty, or just plain annoyed. its cool, we can still be friends. maybe not true friends. but i thank you a million times over for stepping up, and i hope we are still friends. pretty good friends again. its weird not being friends. oh, and thank you for the birthday wish.
thanks again and again....
Love- Me

On another note, i dont think i ever wrote about my wonderful friends Jess and Ellen. Thank you guys for my birthday day...it was lovely. I *love* the two of you, thanks for bein such great friends.

just kiss me before i go

Sun, 18 Apr 2004 03:07:32 GMT

well isn't that special?
hey...fuck the whole friend thing
seriously

Thu, 15 Apr 2004 03:35:22 GMT

The night has fallen down the staircase...

tomorrow i'm leaving
know that i love you,
and i'm going to miss you
alot

i wish the world was flat like the old days
then i could travel just by folding a map

i felt like updating, but i'm now realizing i have nothing to say...

you're in my thoughts...
more then you'd expect.
i'm so sorry, to all of you
about the entire thing.
seeing her was so strange...
i remember when we were all close,
and she called the house...
i miss you all

wow...goodnight...fuck you

Wed, 14 Apr 2004 04:52:00 GMT

Ellen~
Thanks Asshole
~Love me

Sat, 03 Apr 2004 03:45:06 GMT

Just...
Ahhhhhh
Wow

Thu, 01 Apr 2004 02:03:39 GMT

i am entirely dissapointed (in life) tonight.

so heres to cold walks
and late nights
missing you
and feeling alright